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Guitar chord forum - chordie → Guitars and accessories → Guitar purchases: gaining spousal approval
Any success stories on revealing/introducing a new guitar acquisition to a spouse? My collection would be larger and my stress level lower if I could master this process! Meanwhile my doghouse grows cluttered.
get her interested in playing too! LOL! Or.... give her a couple hundred dollars to spend on whatever she'd like!!
I always say something along the lines of: "well, I could be spending this money at a bar; guitars keep me home and relatively healthy". I must admit, while I have 12 or so guitars my approach is not 100% effective especially on the more expensive models
There is an old saying " its easier to ask for forgiveness than permission"...use at your own risk though.. 
You never get good at it. I think it out for months before actually buying it. Just bring it in the house when she's not there and hope she won't notice the extra one.
With every guitar some sort of jewelry should come just for this very topic. My wife tells me i don't get another guitar until she has another ring. That would be a great addition to any music store. I could see it now the jewelry dept right next to the acoustics 
With every guitar some sort of jewelry should come just for this very topic. My wife tells me i don't get another guitar until she has another ring. That would be a great addition to any music store. I could see it now the jewelry dept right next to the acoustics
ohhhh.... maybe THAT is where I need to look to open up my salon/spa ... next to a music store. "Honey, you go in there and just relax for a little while. I'll go find SOMETHING to do around here!"
I tell my wife "You spend more at the hairdresser in a year than this guitar costs, now go make me a sammich".
OK, maybe I don't say the last part 
X-mas is comming hint around or just buy one and take it like a man. or hide it under the bed, lol... tough one eh.
badeye
I guess I'm the lucky one here, while I have not bought expensive guitars, my wife has always told me that if I want it, buy it, she asks for nothing in return, Again, I haven't spent much on the two I have, but I have been looking at Martins as of the last 6 months or so. as well as other guitars. We are lucky that we are about to come into a little windfall that was unexpected, so maybe, just maybe the Martin could be in sight, or some other guitar that grabs me and says"I belong with you. She's a very sweet loving beautiful Lady, and I'm so lucky to have her.
Cam
I've yet to find a successful and dignified way of getting approval to buy something guitar related. Even new strings are frowned upon.
I can normally get by with the 'I hardly ever spend any money just for me'. My bike? no problem - tires, brake pads, new helmet, that's a safety thing. New running shoes, that's a health thing.
But guitar? "Why" is normally all I get in response to my pleading. Eventually she backs down though, but it does take a lot of time and commitment.
Name the guitar after her. She may complain less when you spruce up her namesake.
A lot of shrimpers around here name their boats after wives and daughters. A gallon of paint to adorn ol' "Bessie" is hard to refuse.
toots
From one cramped and cluttered doghouse to another...find one or two of those really cool bumper stickers that show a stick figure man holding a bunch of guitars! The caption "Love One Woman...Many Guitars"... then remind her that the shape of a guitar is sensual and seductive...just like her! Be sure to play some music just for her!
Or you could do the manly thang! "Woman! I'll buy as many of these guitars that I want and can afford!"
You never get good at it. I think it out for months before actually buying it. Just bring it in the house when she's not there and hope she won't notice the extra one.
lol
I'm noticing a distinct lack of input in this thread from the female guitar players on chordie (mekidsmom excepted of course!) - are they keeping their secrets secret? or is it that easy for them to acquire guitars?
I'm fortunate in not having to negotiate with anyone, but even more so in having been loaned a lovely acoustic guitar by a fellow chordian while I'm finding my feet. or should that be my fingers? Now here's another question - how to repay such wonderful generosity?
RS
Seriously guys... I can tell you that a few years ago (when I knew NOTHING about guitars, and did not really care about them), I bought my husband a guitar from Wal-Mart. Yep... I am ashamed to say it, but it happened. He talked and talked about guitars, and I thought I'd be a sweetheart and surprise him. He's been diddling with that evil thing for a few years now. He DID know better, but accepted it graciously and never complained. He isn't really as INTO guitar as I am, but I'll bet he would be if he had something to call his own that was decent! I finally decided just a short time ago that I wanted to play. I picked his up and then actually started learning about guitars. I talked about what I wanted in a guitar... and for our anniversary he offered to take me guitar shopping. He let me pick out the guitar I wanted (I still didn't know too much about them, except at that point I had an idea of what I wanted within a very LOW price range, and realized that his was crap)... and he bought me the one I picked.
So now what? I want him to get a new guitar that he can love (and maybe we can start a bonfire with the Wal-mart guitar)... so, honestly... if you can get her interested, you'll get your new guitar... but then... you'll have to buy her one too!!!!
On the other hand... I don't know what will happen when I decide that I want ANOTHER guitar (I mean, when I decide what my next guitar will be... of course I already want another one!) ... I don't think it will be so easy to acquire more ... unless of course, I get him one that's more expensive than mine first... and then, maybe I'll be able to get a nicer one! ha ha! What's that saying, "Give and then you shall receive" - something like that!
You have the right idea, MKM, but it is a fact that most spouses just aren't into guitars and never will be. Mine isn't and we had quite a talk when my new Martin arrived. She got over it in time (or did she). I won't know until the next big argument about something else, when she will bring it up out of the blue. i Always talk about the new guitar I want for months to ease the pain, but it doesn't necessarily work. If you really want something bad, you have to just get it.
Upon finding out that my wife was pregnant with our son ( a little over 4 years ago) she surprised me with a new Gibson J-45 lefty. I had dreamt of owning one of these fine guitars for over 15 years. The guitar, and our son is everything I thought they be and then some!
I'm one of the lucky ones who doesn't have to do too much persuading and convincing when it's new guitar time. My wife understands that I need quality instruments to keep the money coming in. We do have limits though;1) I must not exceed one weeks gig pay on any said instrument, 2) and when a new item comes in, an old one must go out. This one is tough, real tough sometimes!
Peace and Guitars,
SouthPaw41L
Upon finding out that my wife was pregnant with our son ( a little over 4 years ago) she surprised me with a new Gibson J-45 lefty. I had dreamt of owning one of these fine guitars for over 15 years. The guitar, and our son is everything I thought they be and then some!
I'm one of the lucky ones who doesn't have to do too much persuading and convincing when it's new guitar time. My wife understands that I need quality instruments to keep the money coming in. We do have limits though;1) I must not exceed one weeks gig pay on any said instrument, 2) and when a new item comes in, an old one must go out. This one is tough, real tough sometimes!
Peace and Guitars,
SouthPaw41L
The first part of this is beautiful and I can fully appreciate the gifts of a fine guitar and a fine son.
The middle bit I can relate to as you have to speculate to accumulate...
2) though. I am really struggling with this one as... the outgoing one has already paid it's dues and deserves an honourable retirement in familiar surroundings with loving attention once in a while?
Men are from Mars and women, well nobody's sure but Led Zeppelin had a pretty good idea in Dazed and Confused 
My beautiful and much loved wife bought me my first guitar a few years ago and I thought 'oh dear, I'll have to put my money Where my mouth is and learn to play'. I do my best and can bang out a few tunes and even sing along without embarassing myself too much. She then started making 'I wish' noises so I bought a guitar for her for a birthday and guess what? It hangs on the wall gathering dust... except when I play it!
Nice try MKM
hahaha, love this thread,
At the end of the day, if you add up how much your missus would spend on shoes, hair, nails, cloths, handbags, buety products, coffee, and all the other cr@p, I would say 1 guitar purchase a year (provided it dont take food off the table) is resonable,
But try getting your missus to see that logic is a totally different story., I cant even get a pair of fitting shorts LOL
You can always tell your spouse you want too get a set of drums. most will be happy to let you get a guitar.
You can always tell your spouse you want too get a set of drums. most will be happy to let you get a guitar.
This has to be a winner....
Hi mskjlk,well it worked for me!!, I am glad I did not get drums I would have driven my neighbors crazy,although I did play them for awile about fifteen years ago.
hahaha, love this thread,
At the end of the day, if you add up how much your missus would spend on shoes, hair, nails, cloths, handbags, buety products, coffee, and all the other cr@p, I would say 1 guitar purchase a year (provided it dont take food off the table) is resonable,
But try getting your missus to see that logic is a totally different story., I cant even get a pair of fitting shorts LOL
ha ha ha... from a woman's point of view (sorry guys) that stuff is maintenance, like guitar strings! LOL! A trip to the spa for a full day of relaxation would equal a new guitar. Something special, not the every day stuff. Geez, you wouldn't want her walking around with grey straggly hair, dingy fraying jeans and no makeup now would you? Ahhh... she'd scare even you away then!
And I agree... the drums VS. a guitar is a SURE winner!!
Bonedaddy - at least there IS a new guitar in the house nonetheless? (yes, that is the kind of thing a woman would say).
Hmmm... this really is a tricky one if you have a spouse that doesn't comprehend the differences and the love of guitar. To me, it's addictive like a really good book series. Maybe just "talking" and sharing your "feelings" about the guitar and playing could help since after all woman are all about talk and feelings (yes, from Venus not mars we don't go into the cave to think things out we call a village meeting)! If she could only understand where you're coming from and WHY you want more... maybe you'd get further? I don't know for sure how to explain that to someone that isn't into it tho and just sees the dollar signs and wood. Feelings, feelings is all I can come up with. Guess I'm not much help here as in the end I think I'm also lucky to have a spouse (albeit a man) that comprehends my love of music and the difference in guitars.
When I played professionally, my wife was approachable and reasonable about my instrument purchases. I always bought used but special guitars and got most amps and other equipment from fellow musicians or our local music exchange.
I always learned her favorite songs and played them to her often. She likes mushy tunes.
She has a pitch problem with her singing but I found one song, ("Something" by the beatles that had an easy limited range) and I coached and accompanied her on it and she won a local talent show singing it. That seemed to satisfy her and she hasn't cared to sing again onstage and since, is content to caterwall along with the radio.
Guitar chord forum - chordie → Guitars and accessories → Guitar purchases: gaining spousal approval
