local sayings (Page 1 of 2)

Yes I remember this saying as a kid. Another saying similiar to that one was 'freeze the nuts of a bridge'.  Havent heard those in a while.

Brrrrr thats cold... Badeye..

Here's an old saying that made its rounds a few years back,implying it works well. 

"that's slicker then deer guts on a doorknob"

Kenny

Ah Yes, now that I read this reply I think I seen this on tv before. So thats settled it is not a saying from glasgow, just sounds like it should be,lol.

I like badeyes nuts off a bridge
Also Kenny's deers guts,

The Beastie Boys have a song by this name; Brass Monkey

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YXZ3yUZTlrA

back to the odd/bizarre sayings;

This stuff's funnier'n' a one legged cat on a frozen pond.

or, funnier'n'a hairlip askin' for a bottle of wocestershire sauce at the steak house.........

I use this one in the summer....."Man it's hotter than two whores having the same dream."

old west country sayings .."Bright as a cat's arse in the moonlight"
                                       Or "Be rain or dark fore morning"

My Sweet Irish Honey bought me an English to Irish translation book so we could converse.   From it, I learned two more glorious terms.

"Mankey" as in "general grungy icky dirty feeling" and "skanger," a woman of questionable moral character.

The next band I play in will be called "The Mankey Skangers" or I'm quitting. 

Two crass ones, for which I will self-edit are:

"Colder than a witch's ***."   *** is a crass term for a mammory gland. 

The other is "Slicker than **** on ice."  **** is something that comes out the southern end of your dog when it's facing north. 

The doorknob one I always heard as "slicker than snot on a doorknob."  Which never made much sense to be because snot's kind of sticky. 

My momma had all sorts of phrases that I've no idea how they got started.  She used to say she was "mad enough to spit cotton."  She meant angry but always said mad.  No idea what it means, but I figure it must be very, very angry because she was usually a funny color between red and purple when she said it. 

My dad called someone "Lower than a pregnant snake" once.  He never says anything unpleasant about anyone.  That one's stuck with me as it was so uncharacteristic of him, but also because it was funny. 

- Zurf

My wife's mother used expressions from a hundred years ago.
She would say:
"You don't believe horns will hook."
If you visit was too short, she said" You just come over for a chunk of fire?" and..."It's hotter than a two dollar pistol."
We often say around here:
It's slicker than owl sh##. The wind blew so hard I saw a seagull lay the same egg twice. It's so hot I saw two fire hydrants fighting over the same dog. I'm so hungry my stomach thinks my throat's cut. Lower than whale sh##. I'm so broke I can't afford to pay attention. Colder than the landlord's heart. And, busier than a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest.

I love this song. I done this on youtube with pictures to go wit hthe lyrics to make it a bit funnier.

Ken

This thread is as mad as a bucket of greasy frogs.