i sound the same on most songs

Here's something that might amuse you.
20 or so years ago I was roughly a "1 year" player like you are now. I've always been a big fan of Gordon Lightfoot and so one of the ways I learned to play was by focusing on the stuff that I knew how it should sound - i.e. a lot of Gordon Lightfoot. I bought the anthology and learned many songs from it. One day I was playing for some family and friends and my sister gently said to me - gee, you play that stuff really well... but do you know any other stuff, because the Lightfoot is getting boring.
Well, with that I set out to expand my horizons and now 20 years later I find a couple of things. One is that I have developed a particular kind of style that finds its way into whatever I play, but it is definitely not a repeated strum pattern... rather, its just a kind of style, if that makes any sense. Oh - the other thing is that I no longer remember most of those Lightfoot tunes, lol.
My point is that I had to challenge myself to play things that were much different than what I had gotten comfortable with. When I was doing that, every song I learned seemed to feel like I was learning the guitar all over again. That was a little frustrating because I felt like after making such progress, suddenly I was back at square one again. But in time square one was actually square two, and so on. So to break the little "rut" you find yourself in, you need to take on songs that just will not fit into that rut. If that turns into starting a new rut, well at least now you have two. And keep expanding from there. I think its a life long road and you wont have all the answers in 1, 10, or 100 years of playing, but the more you try new things, the more the lessons learned from that will give you a variety of tools to pick from when you play.
I'm not sure this ramble makes a lot of sense, but I hope you kind of get what I'm trying to say at least.
Just keep moving forward and don't worry about where you're going with it, but focus on the enjoyment you experience along the way.
All the best to you!

A few things for you to try;

1) Get yourself a capo. Place it on different frets and discover a whole new tonal outburst from your instrument.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capo

2) Experiment with alternate tunings.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guitar_tuning

3) Learn 6,5,& 4 string barre chords
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barre_chords

4) Alternate finger picking with playing with a pick

5) Go to different places when you jam( the mountains, the beach,river,creek{some sort of aquatic environment} You'll be surprised what nature will do to your state of mind.

Peace and Guitars,
SouthPaw41L

Study the links and eventually they will help you, I promise! ...and use your fingers on your strumming/finger-picking hand and never say I CAN'T.

okay,  i will take everyones advise (which is what i was looking for) and try to apply,  and again thank you,  i don't know what i would do without this kind of site where i can ask questions "safely"  (without anyone looking at me like i have five heads or something) lol

Hi joy123
I'm assuming your've got the open chords and some barres down ie your comfortable chord changes etc.
Picking through chords in a  arpeggio style can bring variations to your playing.
Songs you know well can sound different without to much practice.
Ark

All good advice.  I started off with Lightfoot as well then I learned to finger pick chords as well as strum.  Coming here and looking up the songs I love, going to music stores irl and inline and looking for songbooks from different singers/bands was also a way to break the monotony.

Right or wrong I try to listen to the song and keep time with the "beat" of the song. Think "1" as a down strum and "&" as an up strum. So your strum pattern would be;
Down....Down....Up....Up...Down....Up............ or
   1          2        &      &       3        &      1

To me, I can't think of a song where this would work. (not saying you are wrong, just saying this is a pattern I don't use) I play mostly older country songs and use a;
Down....Down....Up....Down.....Up.....Down....up...   
    1         2        &         3        &         4        &         1  or

Down....Up....Down....Up.....Down....Up......Down......Up...
   1        &        2        &          3       &          4          &        1

Try either of these pattern on songs in a 4/4 time for something different.

In 3/4 time a completely different pattern is used

Down...Up....Down....Up....Down....Up......
   1       &        2        &        3        &        1   or

Down....Down.....Up......Down.....Up.....
   1           2        &          3          &        1

Struming is just timing. Hear the BEAT and match the strum to it.

Nela

Mr. Zurf always seems to have the ability to trim around the fat and get right to the meat of the matter. I couldn't agree with you more. It's gotta be that crystal clear stream water up in your parts, or some kinda' liquid!?!?(e-hee)

Joy, 

I have been that man!  Been playing now about 4 years and boy did I go through that same sound thing!   I play a lot of Irish and folk and that can really sound the same.   Two things to try.  First work in some pull offs or hammer ons into the strums.  In some songs you could also miss out a strum...the sound from the previous strum will ring on and it gives a great feel.

The other thing to do is to not strum but pick instead.   Thumb 123 or some other version.  This will work on all sorts of stuff from Green Day to The Animals to slow ballads.

But the best way out of this is, as I've been told before is to listen to the song and not to depend too much on tabs.

Hope this helps a bit....

Pat

joy123,
You have become aware of a major problem for guitarists playing alone. Having one song sound like the next is a good way to empty any room fast.
Now you can keep this in mind when you select songs to learn. Keep in mind how the new material contrasts with the tunes you already have on your list. Go for a wide variety.
I bought an effects pedal for my electric to change up the guitar sound - phase shift for ballads, distortion for boogie tunes.
I found that as I age I find myself choosing more slow tunes. DANGER! As you age be sure to have lots-o-boogie stuff for the young ones. It may be like work to pound it out but the 20's and younger will dig it. The golden years are no time to turn square.
I have a long list of silly novelty songs for me and others that like to laugh. I like to add a tear jerker to a silly set for contrast. Make 'em laugh. Make 'em cry.

In my haste to read thru everything, I missed SouthPaw's awesome advice!