• From: Wellington New Zealand
  • Registered: 2010-03-24
  • Posts: 1,388

Topic: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

I`ve taken a big gamble on doing this but i have faith in human nature so here goes.
for many years now ive been suffering depression off and on,i`ve acted /lied/hidden etc
didn`t tell anyone as i didn`t even understand it myself so how can you explain to others
also i didn`t want to burden those close to me,also a terrible stigma attached.
i was embarrassed  guilty and ashamed.after a recent series of panic attacks i couldn`t
take the acting any more.there was a lot of tears to put it mildly.
looking back at songs ive written over the years i now see they were often about me.
im getting some councilling and being tought techniques to cope with all the unless stuff
going round in my head.
the reason im writing  this is because once i became totally honest with people it has started
an amazing healing process,with out exception every single person has been understanding
and supportive.i don`t want sympathy,but i do want something from YOU,probably a quarter of
people ive opened up to is suffering too.this came as a shock to me.but i found talking to them
was good for me and vice versa,win win.it`s so simple it`s a bloody crime we`re all hiding/acting.
if you`re one of these people im very happy if you email me for a chat,if you notice someone whos
changed and become withdrawn not their usual self please broach this subject with them.
i feel well on the road to recovery now,mostly from just talking and being honest with some support.
thanks for taking the time to read this,am happy if you pass it on.
https://soundcloud.com/rough-as-gut/that-man 

The King Of Audio Torture
  • From: The Land Of Song
  • Registered: 2007-12-10
  • Posts: 5,704

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

My grandson who is 15 has been showing some of the symptoms you've mentioned. He grew his hair long to hide his face ( I believe) and he is a handsome boy. His father bought him a bass guitar and I've tried encouraging him even asked him to join in an open mic night with me and some friends to no avail.
He had a bad accident some years ago where he had a fractured skull, so with that and his parents splitting up and he's a shy kid and very intelligent a self confessed nerd and recluse, we all worry about him. He has in recent months come out a bit even gone on a date!!! He's cut his hair and I've tried getting him interested in my new bass....I can see from your post that we need to get him to open up. So thanks for your post, my eyes have been opened.     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Phill Williams's Website

3 Reply by Peatle Jville (edited by Peatle Jville 2019-12-11 20:26:56)

  • Registered: 2015-07-31
  • Posts: 2,793

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

Good one EB . I am glad you are talking about this. As you know I got hIt by depression and anxiety years ago. It came on real quick at a time when my life was going good outwardly but on the inside I was falling apart. I went from being a confident person to a mess. I was in a very dark space but with help and time I am now in a good place, The brain is an organ that can play up like any other part of the body. Now I am in a good space. Way back in the past  I had to get help and  find ways to get my self back to being a normal functioning person it all took time. Now I know what can trigger my brain to go into a dark space I have good stategies to avoid that.. A big part of my recovery was having people to talk to and also finding out that depression and anxiety can hit anyone. The people I know who have been through this are quiet often people I wouldnt have suspected to have experienced this until they opened up and have shared their experience with me.

  • From: Scott County, Virginia, U.S.A.
  • Registered: 2008-03-19
  • Posts: 794

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

You are not alone, I understand what you are living with.  Nothing can make it "go away",  understanding is the first step in learning how to "live with depression and anxiety".  Drugs can help but keep in mind that these same drugs used for treating depression also can have some terrible side effects. Sometimes it takes a long time to find a combination of drugs that works and may need minor adjustments as time passes, what works for one person may not work for another person.  The chemistry of human brain is still not fully known and treatment with drugs is mostly trial and error, so its important to keep a daily journal to help you adjust.  It ain't fun, its just a fact of life.     

Live in the "now" - a contentment of the moment - the past is gone - the future doesn't exist - all we ever really have is now and it's always "now".
  • Zurf
  • Zurf
  • Blunt but well meaning moderator
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  • From: Virginia, USA
  • Registered: 2007-06-27
  • Posts: 7,522

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

I've been depressed most of the past three to five years or maybe even longer, and subject to panic attacks a lot longer than that. Everyone who doesn't suffer from it just gives you assignments. Do this. Do that. Change your schedule, your life, your diet, your habits. Great, just what someone with anxiety needs is more pressure and assignments.

I learned no one is going to help, but also that no one else is responsible, so it's up to me. I've spent about eight months now doing a rectal lobotomy to get my head out of my butt. My doctor wouldn't prescribe anything, so I researched herbal supplements that are double blind tested and found to as effective as prescription meds with fewer side effects. My doctor told me I should have come to her if I thought I needed medical supply when I reminded her that I twice requested support that she denied, and besides they're working so tough nuts. She can keep her drugs. I'm taking the herbs. That and prayer has helped me a lot. And I bought a bike. I love riding a bike. So prayer, herbs, bike. And with getting a little better at a time, a lot less booze. Doctors are worthless and counselors unavailable if you're not in crisis. Friends and family are nice but no help. Its up to the individual to help himself.     

Edit to add: That was too harsh. Two kinds of friends are helpful. First, those who take you as you are. Topdown literally saved my life one year being nice just because he felt like it. A weekend away broke the very bad cycle I was in, and the near constant laughter at his antics and zest for life. The other kind are those who've been through it or are in it at the moment. Scripture teaches that iron sharpens iron. Metaphorically, I'd say that's right. Two depressed anxious guys with a stocked bar, a sailboat, and a big bay can do a lot of "therapy" in an afternoon. Beamer helped me a bunch, checking in and whatnot in the middle of his pain. Though we were 3,000 miles apart, I felt close. So friends are helpful. It's still up to the individual to deal with what's in his life, but friends that either understand or just take you as is make a difference.

Granted B chord amnesty by King of the Mutants (Long live the king).
If it comes from the heart and you add a few beers... it'll be awesome! - Mekidsmom
When in doubt ... hats. - B.G. Dude
  • beamer
  • beamer
  • THE METALIZER. Naughty Rocker Boy.
  • Offline
  • From: WASHINGTON ST
  • Registered: 2006-07-29
  • Posts: 2,811

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

Zurf wrote:

I've been depressed most of the past three to five years or maybe even longer, and subject to panic attacks a lot longer than that. Everyone who doesn't suffer from it just gives you assignments. Do this. Do that. Change your schedule, your life, your diet, your habits. Great, just what someone with anxiety needs is more pressure and assignments.

I learned no one is going to help, but also that no one else is responsible, so it's up to me. I've spent about eight months now doing a rectal lobotomy to get my head out of my butt. My doctor wouldn't prescribe anything, so I researched herbal supplements that are double blind tested and found to as effective as prescription meds with fewer side effects. My doctor told me I should have come to her if I thought I needed medical supply when I reminded her that I twice requested support that she denied, and besides they're working so tough nuts. She can keep her drugs. I'm taking the herbs. That and prayer has helped me a lot. And I bought a bike. I love riding a bike. So prayer, herbs, bike. And with getting a little better at a time, a lot less booze. Doctors are worthless and counselors unavailable if you're not in crisis. Friends and family are nice but no help. Its up to the individual to help himself.     

Edit to add: That was too harsh. Two kinds of friends are helpful. First, those who take you as you are. Topdown literally saved my life one year being nice just because he felt like it. A weekend away broke the very bad cycle I was in, and the near constant laughter at his antics and zest for life. The other kind are those who've been through it or are in it at the moment. Scripture teaches that iron sharpens iron. Metaphorically, I'd say that's right. Two depressed anxious guys with a stocked bar, a sailboat, and a big bay can do a lot of "therapy" in an afternoon. Beamer helped me a bunch, checking in and whatnot in the middle of his pain. Though we were 3,000 miles apart, I felt close. So friends are helpful. It's still up to the individual to deal with what's in his life, but friends that either understand or just take you as is make a difference.

I LOVE YOU BROTHER!  GLAD I WAS ABLOE TO HELP AS YOU AND OTHERS HERE HAVE HELPED ME THIS PAST YEAR.     

“Find your own sound.  Dont be a second rateYngwie Malmsteen be a first rate you”

– George Lynch 2013 (Dokken, Lynchmob, KXM, Tooth & Nail etc....)
  • beamer
  • beamer
  • THE METALIZER. Naughty Rocker Boy.
  • Offline
  • From: WASHINGTON ST
  • Registered: 2006-07-29
  • Posts: 2,811

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

EASY YOU AND I HAVE HAD GOOD CONVERSATIONS AND GREAT MUSIC ADVICE. WHENEVER YOU WANT TO CHAT LET ME KNOW. IM HERE FOR MY CHORDIE FAMILY.     

“Find your own sound.  Dont be a second rateYngwie Malmsteen be a first rate you”

– George Lynch 2013 (Dokken, Lynchmob, KXM, Tooth & Nail etc....)
  • From: The Land Of Song
  • Registered: 2007-12-10
  • Posts: 5,704

Re: very important topic please read thanks easybeat

I haven't mentioned this before, maybe because I didn't realise I was depressed and stressed. Neither did my doctor until I had an attack in the waiting room. I was advised to cut back on work. So I did a quick count on my daily jobs.
1. My day job, including 12 hour shifts. 2. My union duties, health and safety and representing the "naughty boys". I was also on the quality control committee and audit team. 3. My other job, gigging, which I wasn't going to give up.
So, I dropped my union duties and audit and QA. Went to hospital to have my hernia sorted then shot off on holiday to Turkey, and came back with pneumonia. But I'm right now, retired and my only worries are "will I win at bingo?" probably not     

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Phill Williams's Website