1 Topic by Strummerboy Bill (edited by Strummerboy Bill 2016-04-14 01:06:59)

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Topic: "Don't Cross The Robot"

In my spare time (very little) i've been working on this one. It's played in Em and just about all the chords are minor ones as it's kind of a "sinister" song, but it's supposed to rock a la Alice Cooper's or Warren Zevon's style. It should start with something like "I Am Iron Man" with plenty of feedback and computer noises.

===========================================================================

"Dinner is served, Sir" said my robot as he dropped it on the  table
Never had he done this, and in my brain I heard "disable"!
But too quickly he rolled away to do his programmed work
I just sat there and thought about this disturbing quirk.

Strong lead guitar playing 3 minor chords to lead into the next verse

[Spoken] Isaac Asimov wrote the laws: A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

Chorus

"Don't cross the robot", my friend he said to me
What's that mean I asked and he only said you'll see
Don't ever say the wrong word  or give the wrong command
He'll wreck your home, he'll kill your love and your destruction's close at hand

Don't cross the robot!

I pondered and I wondered what started "Bob's" (that's what I call him) mistakes
Breakfast was a runny egg and he ruined my birthday cake
It was now that I remembered what my friend said to me
And I began to fear him standing there..........!!!!! Eyes aglow..........and staring straight at me!!!!!!

(Draw out the above words so that the two "me's" won't be so obvious)

What had I said what had I done to freak him out so bad?
What did he hear, what did he see that made his circuits mad?
And then it hit me: Lee my love had whispered once in the heat of love
Found the words which set him off : "Oh God"

Repeat Chorus

Robots have no concept of a greater divinity
Asimov was their father and an atheist was he.
He programmed all the robots to react to a  mention of "God"
And destroy all they could see.

So...... (chorus) and fade

================================================================

I wrote this during mine and my wife's many hospital stays a few months ago. Does it make sense to you?
Would you be willing to give it a shot on your guitar?

Thanks

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com

2 Reply by easybeat (edited by easybeat 2016-04-13 02:08:35)

  • From: Wellington New Zealand
  • Registered: 2010-03-24
  • Posts: 1,388

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Gidday Bill
Great to see you are writing.
I think Peatle could do something interesting with this.
I`ll draw his attention to it.
well done you,this is terrific.

The King Of Audio Torture
  • From: Probably Somewhere
  • Registered: 2010-12-09
  • Posts: 2,446

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

I'll have my trio try this.  It'll be like Zappa though.  I like it!

  • From: The Land Of Song
  • Registered: 2007-12-10
  • Posts: 5,704

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

I LOVE A BIT OF SCI-FI. nice one bill, good story with a twist in the tale. i had a quick go and worked out a nice riff, very alice cooper, i just don't have the voice. lets see how BGD gets on, then i may give it a go.  once again....nice one

Ask not what Chordie can do for you, but what you can do for Chordie.

Phill Williams's Website

  • TIGLJK
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Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Good one Bill !
Reminds me a bit of a mix between the Central Scrutinizer from Joe's Garage and the I, Robot movie.
Still giggling about the " OH, God! " part.  very clever of you!!
Great to have you back man  !! Glad Dondra is getting healthier and  back to being herself.
Lastly, thanks for all your kind words of encouragement.

Jim

Your vision is not limited by what your eye can see, but what your mind can imagine.
Make your life count, and the world will be a better place because you tried.

"Use the talents you possess, for the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except only the the best." - Henry Van Dyke
  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Thanks, you guys. It means a lot to me to have your support. That song title just popped up in my lame brain out of nowhere, and when something like that happens (and I know you writers know this already) you get a napkin, a tablecloth, your honey's arms - whatever's handy, and you follow that muse, am I right? (Ah thaink they's a country song in whut I just wrote - You Gotta Follow That Muse - About writing songs. Go for it, somebody!)

I love you guys (and ladies - I will NOT say "gals") and appreciate all you do!

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com
  • From: Probably Somewhere
  • Registered: 2010-12-09
  • Posts: 2,446

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Strummerboy Bill wrote:

I love you guys (and ladies - I will NOT say "gals") and appreciate all you do!

Bill

I answer to "Gal."

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Baldguitardude wrote:
Strummerboy Bill wrote:

I love you guys (and ladies - I will NOT say "gals") and appreciate all you do!

Bill

I answer to "Gal."

Whoops!  wink

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com

9 Reply by Strummerboy Bill (edited by Strummerboy Bill 2016-04-14 01:27:15)

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

"Don't Cross The Robot" ----- Rewritten New Version. Please read and make suggestions, thanks!


"Dinner is served, Sir" my robot said as he dropped it on the  table
Never had he done this, and in my brain I heard "disable"!
But he quickly rolled away to do his programmed work
I just sat there and thought about this disturbing quirk.

Strong lead guitar playing 3 minor chords to lead into the next verse

[Spoken] Isaac Asimov wrote the Three Laws of Robotics: "A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. A robot must obey orders given it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law."

Chorus

"Don't cross the robot", my friend said to me !
What's that mean I asked and he only said you'll see
Don't ever say the wrong word  or give the wrong command
He'll wreck your home, he'll kill your love and your destruction's close at hand ------ [needs work]

Don't cross the robot!

I pondered and I wondered what started "Bob's" (that's what I call him) this line is spoken UNDERNEATH the music, but still audible) mistakes
Breakfast was a runny egg and he ruined my birthday cake
It was now that I remembered what my friend said to me
And I began to fear him standing there..........!!!!! Eyes aglow..........and staring straight at me!!!!!!

(Draw out the above words so that the two "me's" won't be so obvious)

What had I said what had I done to freak him out so bad?
What did he hear, what did he see that made his circuits mad?
And then it hit me: Lee my love and I whispered once in the heat of love
And found the words that set him off : "Oh God!, Oh God! Oh, Lee!"

Repeat Chorus

Robots have no concept of a greater divinity
Asimov was their father and an atheist was he.
He programmed all robots to react to a  mention of "God" ------ [needs work]
And destroy all they could see.



So...... (chorus) and fade

=========================================================

Changes and suggestions made mostly by my wife (who says a "Warren Zevon" style may be good as well) so she gets co-writing credits along with anyone else who might make this happen. ----- Thanks

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com
  • From: Probably Somewhere
  • Registered: 2010-12-09
  • Posts: 2,446

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

can each verse be spoken? that would be rad.

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

In the words of The Isley Brothers, "It's Your Thing.....". Do with it as you please, my friend. smile

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com
  • From: Nova Scotia, Canada
  • Registered: 2013-01-20
  • Posts: 4,083

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Holy free-Holies, Bill ... this is brilliant!

Very imaginative, well constructed, vivid portrayals, and so much more. Having the voiced-over quote from Asimov is a stroke of genius. His book "I, Robot" was a masterpiece, and the film with Will Smith & James Cromwell was also good, even though it differed significantly from Asimov's book.

Nice work indeed!

13 Reply by Strummerboy Bill (edited by Strummerboy Bill 2016-04-14 03:53:34)

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Wow! Thanks for the praise, my friend! My songs come from what I have always written, "When your Muse enters, pay attention and do what she says!"

I have actually not always written this, TF, but I think you know what I mean, right?

Thank you once again, Mon Ami (I am a Poirot fan as well).

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com
  • From: NY
  • Registered: 2009-08-26
  • Posts: 4,320

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Nice imagery, Bill!  I can't wait to hear one of the guys try this!  It's soooo not my singing or playing style, but I like the SOUND that's wandering inside my head.  wink

Art and beauty are in the eyes of the beholder.
What constitutes excellent music is in the ears of the listener.

mekidsmom's Website

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

I've decided to emphasize the word Cross to go along with the last verse.

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com
  • From: Nottingham England
  • Registered: 2014-01-13
  • Posts: 621

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

When's the film coming out? I want a part.

Thick as two short planks

17 Reply by Strummerboy Bill (edited by Strummerboy Bill 2016-04-15 15:35:20)

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Ähhhh ("Meh" in German), I'm thinking maybe this should just be a poem. I'm stuck on the parts which "need work". Anyone wanna take a gander at those places and give me a hand? I'd really love to have a song and I've played Black Sabbath's Iron Man over and over, loving that long bass line and "I AM IRON MAN" at the beginning! smile

Thanks for the compliments/comments, everyone! You're awesome to always leave me a line or two!

Au Revoir for now.   I'm watching 25 years of Poirot on Netflix and I'm beginning to really like the little guy to the point where I want one of those lapel pins for my sport jackets.

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com

18 Reply by Peatle Jville (edited by Peatle Jville 2016-04-17 02:10:01)

  • Registered: 2015-07-31
  • Posts: 2,793

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

I think your words tell it real good as they are. I can see these words been used in many differant ways top writing. I couldnt do  these words justice I am sure some one on chordie will. This could be the start of a concept Album.

  • Jandle
  • Jandle
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Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Bill,   
well done, looking forward to hearing how this one is going to be performed smile

Laugh Lots ... Forgive Much ...  Love one another     smile
Covers and some Originals found over there    ------- >    https://soundcloud.com/ukulelejan

20 Reply by Strummerboy Bill (edited by Strummerboy Bill 2016-04-19 02:35:45)

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Jan!!!!!!!

What??? You didn't think I'd miss you??? My "I'll Just Stop Asking" performer?????

I have these little post-it notes (once upon a time just on my screen border), now on the wall of this "Hell-Hole" I call my "Inner Sanctum". So you are always here! smile

Please don't be a stranger, okay?

And take a look at Kim Noble while you're at it. I think we have a young STAR on our hands!

Your Friend

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com
  • Jandle
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Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Awww thanks Bill,   now that is lovely!!!  I have just been crazy busy here lately (but i just sent you an email with all the info in it - took me awhile to reply to you as i couldn't work out how to send emails on here duh!!) lol 

So glad you still like my song   ~I`ll stop Asking~ , that  means a lot to me as writing songs is still very new to me  smile

I have checked out Kim Noble`s stuff and yes i am a fan already too ...........she is amazing!

So looking forward to hearing how your song goes Bill, make sure to let me and everyone else on here know when you or someone else performs it smile

Your friend too,
Jan.

Laugh Lots ... Forgive Much ...  Love one another     smile
Covers and some Originals found over there    ------- >    https://soundcloud.com/ukulelejan

22 Reply by Peatle Jville (edited by Peatle Jville 2016-04-23 01:59:09)

  • Registered: 2015-07-31
  • Posts: 2,793

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Hi Bill
I have thrown a rough attempt on soundcloud for a couple of days of your clever piece. Hopefully someone who is better at that sort of genre will put together something that will do your piece more justice. It  is under Peatle Jville on Soundcloud.
https://soundcloud.com/eatleville
Your friend,                                                                                                                        https://soundcloud.com/eatleville
Pete

  • From: SC Pa
  • Registered: 2014-03-26
  • Posts: 1,348

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Peatle Jville wrote:

Hi Bill
I have thrown a rough attempt on soundcloud for a couple of days of your clever piece. Hopefully someone who is better at that sort of genre will put together something that will do your piece more justice.
Your friend,
Pete

Is there a link for that "rough attempt"?

__________________________________
[b]Today Is Only Yesterdays Tomorrow[/b]

24 Reply by Peatle Jville (edited by Peatle Jville 2016-04-23 02:01:07)

  • Registered: 2015-07-31
  • Posts: 2,793

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Sorry Uncle Joe
My attempts at doing links havent been that good. I have edited my post above hopefully that will work better, My computer skills are very limited.
Thank you for your reply.
Peatle                                                                https://soundcloud.com/eatleville

  • From: West Georgia
  • Registered: 2006-10-14
  • Posts: 2,557

Re: "Don't Cross The Robot"

Hi Pete

I left comments on SoundCloud, but I wanted to say thanks for taking a shot at the "Robot". I called it an avante garde blues tune and as you said, definitely theatrical.

Thanks once again and hugs to  Maree

Bill

Epiphone Les Paul Studio
Fender GDO300 Orchestral - a gift from Amy & Jim
Rogue Beatle Bass
Journal: www.wheretobud.blogspot. com