Beestie
I like it, and it is very good just the way it is.........but I think as our good friend Phill says -- "a song's gotta have a chorus!"
I'm certainly not a expert by any means ( not even close) , but I really think it has to have some kind of change somewhere - but that's just me and I could be waaaaayyyyy off !
I was playing your version...probably nothing like you play it... but a couple of verses popped in my head:
Here are my thoughts....
[F]Two steps forward and one step back
[C]the more I try, the more I lack
[F]Two steps forward and one step back
It’s [G] got my whole [F]world out of [C]whack
or maybe
[Cadd9]Money, money don’t you do this to me
[F] I’m so down I can hardly breathe
[C] Money money won’t you set me free
[G]From this debt that’s [F]come over [C]me.
I think either might fight in - at least it does how i Play it.
If you don't like 'em - trash 'em that's ok - hell - it's your song ! :
your message is very good as you can tell because it really gets one to thinking about how impactual $$$$$$$$$$$$$ or the lack of can be. Thanks for the great tune.
Good luck trout fishing !
Jim
Your vision is not limited by what your eye can see, but what your mind can imagine.
Make your life count, and the world will be a better place because you tried.
"Use the talents you possess, for the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except only the the best." - Henry Van Dyke