• From: CA
  • Registered: 2007-05-23
  • Posts: 3

Topic: 1st song...untitled

alright guppies... my name is ashley, im 15 and this is my first song posting. i've'nt discovered or written chords for it yet since im quite a rookie to playing guitar. but hopefully i will soon enough. please tell me what you think or if theres any way to make it better. thanks!

(havent thought of a title yet..)

Late last June i was walking by
My old high school
2 weeks past we were free again
Looked at Sir John and said
Do you think i'll ever get there someday?

Well he smiled and touched my hand
you'll be fine, child
Keep on smilin' wide
Chase your dreams as high up in the sky
Be sure to lift up your chin
raise it high
Dont look down for you might fall
one step more to where
you can have it all

you may say home is where you were born
but when you look around
open up your eyes
you will see home is
Surrounded by disguise
You will think:
This is not my home.

  • Registered: 2007-05-22
  • Posts: 86

Re: 1st song...untitled

hey ashley...welcome to chordie and nice song...although u might want to extend it a little bit and put in some chorus or bridge...im 18 by the way...and if you need any help dont hesitate to ask...and ya think of a title soon...like the way you write you lyrics...
keep going
saba

love is like a violin, the music may stop now and then but the strings remain forever...
  • From: Almancil, Algarve, Portugal
  • Registered: 2006-09-02
  • Posts: 6,204

Re: 1st song...untitled

Hello Ashley,

Welcome to the Chordie forum and your first posted song. I am unsure whether your opening words are directed at me or if Guppies is a term of endearment (or worse) lol

The lyircs you have are fine, a nice sentiment, althought you will probably have to alter it a bit to get verses to the same lenghts. Sit down with your guitar and slowly strum chords whilst going through the words. Some chord changes will sound awful, but if you keep trying you will be able to find ones that sound good together. Get a sequence for two lines, repeat it and you have the chords for your first verse.

Give it a try, if you want help as Saba has already pointed out you will always find it here on the forum, either openly or by private e-mail.

Well done,

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Roger Guppy's Website

  • From: Grimsby, UK
  • Registered: 2006-03-04
  • Posts: 604

Re: 1st song...untitled

Like it a lot dude!  Isn't a guppie a fish?  We all live in a goldfish bowl but Guppie?
I tried it kind of plaintive/english folk with a progression of Dm, C, G, Dm on 1st Verse and it sounded ok.  I'd go for more upbeat sound on the second section to match the dreams but your choice, your song, sing it like you mean it and everyone will believe!

I'm the son of rage and love
  • Registered: 2007-06-03
  • Posts: 11

Re: 1st song...untitled

Nice song for your first effort. I agree with Roger, you should firstly get a tempo for your song, slow, fast, rock, pop etc. Then you should try and get a tune in your mind and find the hords to suit that melody. I very rarely use more than 5 chords in my whole song so it is not as hard a task as it sounds. When you get the initial chords you can then add all the other bits like strumming pattern etc. That's the way I do it and I am sure you will find your own method.

Once again good songwriting especially for someone so young

Tommyboy2

  • From: Starkville, Mississippi USA
  • Registered: 2006-03-04
  • Posts: 2,069

Re: 1st song...untitled

Hello AshleyM and bravo on your first song posting!  Keep writing and keep working with ideas.  The musical part of a song is not as hard as it might seem at first . . . look at some songs you enjoy and observe the chords that were used.  Like tommyboy2 has said, most songs only need a very limited set of chords to support the melody.  James

"That darn Pythagorean Comma thing keeps messing me up!"
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pythagorean_comma[/url]

James McCormick's Website

  • From: Almancil, Algarve, Portugal
  • Registered: 2006-09-02
  • Posts: 6,204

Re: 1st song...untitled

To clarify bonedaddy's brief comment. A guppy is a small tropical fish, the female of the species is very plain but the males are very colouful and exotic. Named after Robert John Lechmere Guppy who discovered them in 1866.

Which has absolutely nothing to do with songwriting as fish cannot sing. Whales can but they are mammals.

Roger

"Do, or do not; there is no try"

Roger Guppy's Website

  • From: CA
  • Registered: 2007-05-23
  • Posts: 3

Re: 1st song...untitled

Awww you guppies are so sweet. Thank you so much! And Bonedaddy, you rock! I am so amazed that you actually tried my song! Seriously... like, its so so awe-imspiring to see that you guys take the time to read and try my song. I know, its the first and its not that well. But i'm trying to do someting more to it...its just really confusing. well...lets see...im not exactly sure on what a guppy is, but yeah, guppies you are. And thank you so much, loves.  And yeah, i will definitely be unfrightened to ask for help. thanks!