One important item, that I have not seen discussed in this thread, is the way you hold your guitar while learning (playing) barre chords. Are you sitting down or standing up? If you are just beginning to learn barre chords I suggest you practice while sitting. Also, keep the guitar neck tilted upwards and back (little bit) so you can see the fret board. If you practice while standing, get your strap adjusted to where the guitar rests higher across your chest (and keep the guitar neck at an upward angle) Its not very much fun to just form and strum barre chord after barre chord but it is important until you develope some finger strength and muscle memory. After you get the basic patterns down (E shape and the A shape barre chords are the easiest) you can begin to learn some easy 3 chord songs. Start in the key of C as this is an easy progression - C, F and G and only requires mimimal finger movement.
Form an open C chord and strum. (for the F chord you already have your ring finger, 3rd fret 5th string as an anchor - DON"T MOVE IT)
Now form an E shape barre chord with your (middle, ring and pinky) index finger at the 1st fret (DO NOT MOVE YOUR RING FINGER FROM THE OPEN C POSITION YOU WERE JUST STRUMING) This is an F chord and strum.
From the F chord, keep all fingers (middle, ring and pinky) down in the same position and slide up the guitar neck to where your index finger is now on the 3rd fret (middle, ring and pinky are still in the basic E position) - this is a G chord. And strum.
Once you have this 3 chord progression down you are ready to play hundreds of songs - by adding a capo there are now thousands of songs you can play with this 3 chord progression.
Also, keep in mind that while practicing your barre chords to not forget your minor and 7 chords. As an example when playing a E shaped barre chord you can lift your middle finger from the string and you now have a minor chord - if you lift up your pinky you now have a 7 chord.
Try this and see if it helps.
Nela