Why does it seem like everywhere I go people critisize me. Especially at school. This past year.. one of my favorite teachers {my band teacher} told us she was leaving to go to a different job. I was crying basically the whole day which I know is a little strange. But still, can't people just leave me alone? How do they know how it makes me feel inside. How it affects my personality. And how much it makes me cry when I am home by myself. I am so tired of people judging me after knowing me for like 5 seconds. How do they know what's going on in my life. I guess I probably won't know this. I don't know if I will ever figure it out. I just wish I could be myself around some of my friends. I am more or less a completely different person at school than compared to how I am at home. At home I feel like I can be myself. And it's hard because most of the time I keep all of my emotions bottled up inside and never let anyone know how I really feel. And it's kind of hard around my parents because they always suspect something is wrong. But I don't tell them. I don't want them to worry. I don't want to add that extra stress on them. It is so hard for me. And I just wish I could talk to somebody about it. But, I don't. So.. instead of being happy all of the time... I start crying for no reason at school. I just don't want to talk to a counseler. Or anybody really. But, I will say there is at least one person at school that I can talk to. She is always there for me. No matter what. And she understands me. Her and my mom. They are the two people I feel like I can talk to. I don't know why people critisize me. Most of them don't even know one thing about me. I will probably be trying to figure this out for along time.
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