Not sure of the kind of critique you are after here 
.. the song is fine... some things I'd balance a little structurally ... Other than that Nice song
Cheers
1 2008-02-25 05:58:53
Re: "Once Upon a Time" (8 replies, posted in Songwriting)
2 2008-02-25 04:45:04
Re: "the old steam engines" (10 replies, posted in Songwriting)
Nice work
Not sure of the melody you had in mind.. (I can't envisage it from a chord patten.. I'm not much of a giutar player) but it skips along nicely to an old Australian folk melody...
just need to check some of the there's ... between there is and there are....
Cheers
3 2008-02-25 04:36:15
Re: PIECES OF DRIFTWOOD (4 replies, posted in Songwriting)
Hey man nice
My only nit ... THE VOICES SINGING IN THE DARK ON THEIR WAY HOME UNDER BRINE
You say it is under water for domestic use... but brine is salt water... Just a thought
Cheers