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Apparently 9's are good for beginner's

We used to have a pure bred golden Labrador. It was a beautiful dog. Unfortunately we had to sell it.

Do you have to use special paint or anything?

When they don't sound as loud as they used to.

Um... I've been told I'm quite good. I wanna go into a band when I finish school so I practice at least an hour a  day.

Here's another one.
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman are driving through the desert when their car breaks down. So they have to get out.

The Englishman takes a bottle of wine with him, the Scotsman takes an umbrella and the Irishman takes a car door.

On the way they meet this old gentleman. He says to the Englishman "I know why you've got the wine so you can have a drink when your thirsty", He says to the Scotsman "I know why you've got the umbrella to keep the sun off you", "but" he says to the Irishman "Why have you got the car door?" and the Irishman replies "If I get hot I can wind the window down!"

Well, there was this blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. So one evening she went home and memorized all the state capitals.

Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement,

"I've had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do...I memorized all the state capitals."

One of the guys, of course, said "I don't believe you. What is the capital of Nevada?"

"N", she answered.

I love the sound of steel strings.

You're really good with this songwriting thing. Do you try to get them published or send them to some record company?

This reminds me of when I started learning.

Steve Vai, Yngwie Malmsteen , Steve Harris,  Adrian Smith and Janick Gers.