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How come it is that most famous Scottsmen gotta go somewhere else to get famous?

That's right.  You're going to put your index finger on the scale root on the E string, and it's going to move straight across the fretboard to the little e string.    That pattern will produce a minor pentatonic every time.

Nope.  I'm just a complete theory geek.  I've been playing music since I was in 5th grade, and grew up to be an engineer.  I don't have a lot of time to "figure stuff out" so I took a little time to learn theory, which has saved me a ton of time when it gets down to actually playing the instrument.   I also like to teach (taught at UW, and worked for Seattle Public Schools for a while) and I absolutely love kids, so this is a good outlet for me.  It lets me share some knowledge, it lets me work out my theory geekisms, and it satisfies my engineering need to know why something works, rather than just knowing it does.

As far as the girl with the '68 Gibson:   Dude, I'd never advocate violence in any form against any one, but dude!   A '68 Gibson Les Paul?  Is there a statute of limitations on that?

* droool *

I'd start by adjusting my expectations.     There are a whole lot of scales, but that doesn't mean there's a whole lot to learn.   

There are 12 major scales, for example.  You can play all of them using one pattern (assuming a 14 fret guitar).  There are 12 natural minor scales.  Likewise, you can play all of them using one pattern.  So, assuming you learn just those two patterns, you can now play 24 different scales.

So where should you start?  Take two tracks:  The practical, and the theoretical.   The practical side should be stuff that you can use to play *right now.*  Those would be the minor and major pentatonic patterns.    There are five of each, but just like the major and minor scales, you can play them with one pattern.   You can use pentatonic scales to solo in just about every kind of music you can name, from baroque to zydeco.   There are five minor pentatonic patterns, and five major pentatonic patterns.   Your next practice goal should be to learn one of each.

The theoretical side should be focused on improving your knowledge.  What makes a major scale a major scale?   What is the relationship of the minor scales to the majors?  These kinds of things won't have immediate practical application to the fretboard, but they will pay huge dividends down the road.

Yes, it's within your possibility.   Scales are, in reality, bone dead simple. 

The problem with them arises when people denigrate them as "unnecessary" when what they really mean is "I never hear rock stars play them."   These are people that want to "play songs" rather than "play the guitar."   If you want to play other peoples songs, they're not critical.  If you want to play solo and lead lines of your own, and improvise, they are critical.

I always advise people to practice scales and chord transitions before ever attempting to play songs.   The time to start practicing them is right now.

You shouldn't hate scales.   You should spend at least 15 minutes every day running scales, and they should be a regular part of your practice routine.  When you see the improvement in your playing as a result of knowing them, you'll love them, as their value will be evident, and undeniable.

Well, no.   Papal authority through the dark ages was about as muddled as the authority of the Monarchs.   Popes and Bishops used to have hereditary lineage, too.   They needed each other to hold onto power.  There was a period of about 400 years where there were two popes, or no pope at all.  In those times, the pope wannabes would appeal to the Monarchs for support.  If you had a weak monarch, he could appeal to Papal authority to hold onto power.   Like I said, it was a handy power sharing agreement between the Monarch and the Papists.  They helped each other remain in power.   Martin Luther was the beginning of the end, and Henry the VIII was the stake in the heart of it, but even Henry called upon the Devine Right to rule.  He just started his own church and declared himself the head of it.

Some balls are held for charity, and some for fancy dress
but when they're held for pleasure they're the balls that I like best...

Pure.  Unadulterated.  Genius.

Beer goggles fit your ears, too. 

Big Balls

Greatest song EVAR!!!

Washington State, or DC?  I live in the Bellevue area, and reherse in Seattle.

People are going to tell you to learn a scale in a particular key.  I'm not.   There are 12 possible scales within the chromatic scale for any mode.  Then you have your pentatonics and other kinds of scales as well.  That's a whole lot to learn if you think of it in terms of key.   

The good news is that all of those scales break down into a small number of patterns on the fretboard.  There are five major and minor scale patterns, and likewise five major and minor pentatonic patterns.   Those are the patterns I'd learn first.

Learn one minor pentatonic pattern, and you can play minor pentatonics in 12 different minor keys.  Learn one major pentatonic scale, and you can play pentatonics in 12 different major keys.   Same with the major and minor scale patterns.  Learn one, and you can play in any key.    It makes it much simpler to learn to play scales, because you can simply ask "What key are we in?" and play.   The more patterns you learn (There are 5 pentatonic patterns, for example) the more options you will have on the fretboard.

I play scales every day.  You should, too.  More accurately, I practice scale patterns every day.

Summary:  The practical application of scales is not in the key you want to play in, but the scale pattern you put to the neck of your instrument.

Here are the five minor pentatonic patterns.  Note that this is not the "A minor pentatonic pattern."  It's only A if you start on A.  If you start it on B, then it's B minor, etc.

http://www.tonart.com/Main/ScaleLessons … terns.html

Minor pentatonics are good scales to start on, as they are easy to learn, and immediately useful.

Chord *shapes* man!  Put that cappo on, and you're not playing G, C, or D any more. 

Chord = notes coming out of the guitar.

Chord shapes = what you do with your hands.

Pedantry = What Jerome does regarding theory.