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The Best Things in Life  Half Man Half Biscuit

[C]My uncle Charlie is a [G]cynical man
And his [C]wife's a touch sceptical [G]too
They've got [C]one of those stickers in the [G]back of their van
It says "[C]We've seen the prices at the [G]zoo"
Well to[C]day I knocked upon their door and [G]said that I was passing
And [C]Charlie launched a scathing at[G]tack
When I [C]asked him what I'd done he said "You [G]stupid bastard
We [C]live in a cul-de-[G]sac".[C] [G] [C] [G]
[C]Went to Dali's party it was [G]fancy dress
[C]I just stuck an apple in my [G]face
I [C]saw a chap who obviously was [G]out to impress
[C]Reckoned he beat Gagarin in to [G]space
He said "[C]Hi there [G]Salv, like [C]sorry I'm [G]late
But I was [C]getting done [G]up as a Mogul [C]Thrash Ace[G]tate"
[C]Me I got [G]bored, so [C]I went [G]home
[C]Got into [G]bed and [C]came to the con[G]clusion:
[G]There is nothing [C]better in life
Than [D]writing on the [C]sole of your [D]slipper with a [G]biro,
[G]There is nothing [C]better in life
Than [D]writing on the [C]sole of your [D]slipper with a [G]biro,
[G]There is nothing [C]better in life
Than [D]writing on the [C]sole of your [D]slipper with a [G]biro,
[G]There is nothing [C]better in life
Than [D]writing on the [C]sole of your [D]slipper with a [C]biro
On a [D]Saturday night instead of [D7]going to the [G]pub.

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