Uneasy Rider Charlie Daniels
[C]I was takin' a trip out to L.A.
[F]Toolin' along in my Chevrolet
[G7]Tokin' on a number and diggin' on the radi-[C] o ...
[C]Just as I crossed the Mississippi line
[F]I heard that highway start to whine
[G7]And I knew that left rear tire was about to [C] go.
[C]Well, the spare was flat and I got uptight
[F]'Cause there wasn't a fillin' station in sight
[G7]So I just limped on down the shoulder on the rim
[C]I went as far as I could and when I stopped the car
[F]It was right in front of this little bar
[G7]Kind of redneck lookin' joint, called the Dew Drop Inn.
[C]Well, I stuffed my hair up under my hat
[F]And told the bartender that I had a flat
[G7]And would he be kind enough to give me change for a one
[C]There was one thing I was sure proud to see
[F]There wasn't a soul in the place, 'cept for him and me
[G7]And he just looked disgusted and pointed toward the telephone.
[C]I called up the station down the road a ways
[F]And he said he wasn't very busy today
[G7]And he could have somebody there in just 'bout ten minutes or so
[C]He said now you just stay right where you're at
[F]And I didn't bother tellin' the durn fool
[G]I sure as hell didn't have anyplace else to go.
[C]I just ordered up a beer and sat down at the bar
[F]When some guy walked in and said; "Who owns this car?
[G7]With the peace sign, the mag wheels and four on the floor?"
[C]Well, he looked at me and I damn near died
[F]And I decided that I'd just wait outside
[G7]So I laid a dollar on the bar and headed for the door.
[C]Just when I thought I'd get outta there with my skin
[F]These five big dudes come strollin' in
[G]With this one old drunk chick and some fella with green teeth
[C]And I was almost to the door when the biggest one
[F]Said; "You tip your hat to this lady, son."
[G7]And when I did all that hair fell out from underneath.
[C]Now the last thing I wanted was to get into a fight
[F]In Jackson, Mississippi on a Saturday night
[G7]'Specially when there was three of them and only one of me
[C]They all started laughin' and I felt kinda sick
[F]And I knew I'd better think of somethin' pretty quick
[G7]So I just reached out and kicked old green-teeth right in the knee.
[C]He let out a yell that'd curl your hair
[F]But before he could move, I grabbed me a chair
[G7]And said; "Watch him folks, 'cause he's a thoroughly dangerous man.
[C]Well, you may not know it, but this man's a spy
[F]He's an undercover agent for the FBI
[G7]And he's been sent down here to infiltrate the Ku Klux Klan."
[C]He was still bent over, holdin' on to his knee
[F]But everyone else was lookin' and listenin' to me
[G7]And I layed it on thicker and heavier as I went
[C]I said Would you believe this man has gone as far
[F]As tearin' Wallace stickers off the bumpers of cars
[G7]And he voted for George McGovern for president.
[C]He's a friend of them long-haired, hippie type, pinko fags
[F]I betcha he's even got a Commie flag
[G7]Tacked up on the wall, inside of his garage
[C]He's a snake in the grass, I tell ya guys
[F]He may look dumb, but that's just a disguise
[G7]He's a mastermind in the ways of espionage."
[C]They all started lookin' real suspicious at him
[F]And he jumped up an' said; "Now, just wait a minute, Jim
[G7]You know he's lyin' I've been livin' here all of my life.
[C]I'm a faithful follower of Brother John Birch
[F]And I belong to the Antioch Baptist Church
[G7]And I ain't even got a garage, you can call home and ask my wife."
[C]Then he started sayin' somethin' 'bout the way I was dressed
[F]But I didn't wait around to hear the rest
[G7]I was too busy movin' and hopin' I didn't run outta luck
[C]And when I hit the ground, I was makin' tracks
[F]And they were just takin' my car down off the jacks
[G7]So I threw the man a twenty an' jumped in an' fired that mother up.
[C]Mario Andretti woulda sure been proud
[F]Of the way I was movin' when I passed that crowd
[G7]comin' out the door and headin' toward me in a trot
[C]And I guess I should-a gone ahead and run
[F]But somehow I couldn't resist the fun
[G7] But to chase them all just once around the parking lot
[C]Well, they're headin' for their car, but I hit the gas
[F]And spun around and headed them off at the pass
[G7]I was slingin' gravel and puttin' a ton of dust in the air
[C]Ha Ha, well, I had 'em all out there steppin' and fetchin'
[F]Like their heads were on fire and their asses was catchin'
[G7]But I figured I oughta go ahead an split before the cops got there.
[C]When I hit the road I was really wheelin'
[F]Had gravel flyin' and rubber squeelin'
[G7]And I didn't slow down 'til I was almost to Arkansas
[C]Well, I think I'm gonna re-route my trip
[F]I wonder if anybody'd think I'd flipped
[G7]If I went to L.A. - via Omaha.
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